• Now

    Hum of dimmer,
    Heaviness of eyelids,
    Coolness of aluminium,
    Breath at nostril,
    Tension in face,
    Tingle behind ears.

    Fogginess in head,
    Impatience of thoughts,
    Thinking from mind,
    Annoyance of thoughts,
    Sneezing from nose,
    Laugh from mouth.


  • That thing you have to do

    Oh that think you have to do.
    You know the one…

    That book you have to read,
    the piano you have to learn,
    the meditation you have to sit,
    the meal you have to cook,
    the language you have to learn.

    To self improve is a struggle,
    in which you have
    that thing you have to do.

    You may have your ideal self,
    there within reach,
    if only you had that skill,
    were more learned,
    had that something.

    An ache
    to be something more.

    However it’s a shudder,
    a piercing impatience held,
    rattling in your mind.
    Carving out that time for
    that thing you have to do.

    “Oh it’s worth it,”
    you say to yourself.
    “I will be better,
    it will get better,
    it has to!
    I’ll learn to love it,
    get that skill.
    I just have to keep at it.”

    But for now, it’s
    that thing you have to do.

  • Walking slow

    I used to hate the rush hour when commuting on London’s tubes. It wasn’t being cramped as such, I’m fine with personal space invasions to a point. It was the *rush* – people having to push to get off at their stop. Worse still, people bustling others for a chance to catch that next train. Is there a sort of selfishness in their self-serving rush and rampant overtaking? I do wonder that in fury when I’m in a mood. Do they really need to cut those few seconds in your speed-walk? I suppose they might really do, or they could wake up 15 minutes earlier.

    I plod a long, a stone in the current, people passing by. I may be in the way when I stop to look for directions. I try to practice not judging the rushers, the hustlers and the busters. Let them pass, but I’ll pass on being caught up with them.

    But I often do; the train is departing! I am so close, if I just pick up the pace and dodge that woman I could make it! The stress is just not worth it. I don’t feel a sense of achievement if I do make it, only the sweat trapped in my shirt and the guilt of having got in the way or abandoned my sense of calm. If I don’t… well I am disappointed and effort is wasted.

    Don’t have to face any of these dilemmas now. Interesting to reflect on those moments, now they are over a year old. So long commutes, if they return I hope I can face them with a bit of equanimity.

Hello! I’m Tom (he/him), based in London, UK. I write prose & poetry, also some small reflections I want to share. Enjoy 🙂

I have a Youtube channel where I post creative things sometimes.